Monday, November 16, 2015

Paging Mr. Skywalker...

A few weeks ago, one of the middle school teachers (we'll call him Mr. Skywalker) left our school because he got a job much closer to home.  Of course the kids were upset, but I thought things had started to calm down.  Today's installment proves that it's NEVER over in middle school.

Student:  You know that inflatable unicorn head on your wall behind you?

Me:  WHAT?  THERE'S A UNICORN HEAD ON MY WALL?  NO!

*puzzled silence from student*

Me:  Sigh.  Yes, I am aware of the unicorn head on my wall.

Student:  Well, you should get one like that of Mr. Skywalker.  And he should be wearing that red hat.


1.  No unicorns were harmed in the writing of this blog.

2.  It's a fez.  The unicorn wears the fez usually.  Mr. Skywalker would occasionally steal it from the unicorn and wear it for Hat Day or Fanatic Day.  Or Tuesday.

3.  I have no plans to decapitate Mr. Skywalker in order to hang his head on my wall.  Quite frankly, that would be creepy.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

An Act of War

Sometimes things don't turn out as you plan.  I decided to try an anticipatory activity with my classes today to get them to predict what our next story would be about.  Honestly, I thought it would be pretty easy to figure out.  I had them perform some simple tasks using their non-dominant hands.  Then we talked about how they felt while doing the tasks--frustrated, stupid, slow, etc.  The point of this was to get them to predict that the next story was going to involve characters who had issues with their dominant hands (one in a car accident, one in the war in Vietnam) and had to learn to compensate.

The predicting part did not go so well.  When I asked the class why they thought I had made them do this activity, they immediately responded that I was trying to get them to write more neatly.  While that is indeed true for some of them, I noted that we do have other things that we do in ELA other than writing.  Maybe they could make a prediction about something having to do with another topic we are learning about, such as characterization or point of view?

After more discussion, the class finally determined that the activity had something to do with a story we were going to read.  Then a student made a prediction that it might have something to do with veterans since today is Veteran's Day.  I was very excited-YES!  It DOES have something to do with a veteran!  What might that connection be?  WHY WOULD I HAVE MADE EVERYONE WRITE THEIR NAME AND DRAW A TREE USING THEIR NON-DOMINANT HAND?  HOW MIGHT THAT CONNECT TO THE STORY?

And then...a student raises her hand.  Surely we'd gotten to the whole point of the exercise, that one of the characters was a veteran who had injured his hand.  She says, "I may be a little off base with this, but I think it means you are going to send us to war."


If memory serves, I think I need Congress's approval for that.


Sunday, November 8, 2015

Patience, Young Grasshopper...

Last week was interim test week at school.  This means that all language arts and math classes have big big tests and we teachers get the pleasure of grading the constructed responses before scanning the rest of the test in to the gradebook.  One of my former students was a little anxious about finding out his score on his math test, and he stopped his math teacher on her way out the door...

Student: Are you going to have the interims graded by tomorrow?

Math Teacher: Possibly.  It depends upon how long it takes.

Student: Oh, you can pull an all-nighter to get them all done!

Me:  Whoa there chief...it's not quite that easy! [Student's current ELA teacher walks by and I called her into the room]  Tell your ELA teacher what you just said!

Student:  I just want to know what my grades are!  It's important!  Are you going to have our interims graded by tomorrow?

ELA Teacher:  Well, actually, I have no life whatsoever.  So I am just going to go straight home to grade this giant stack of papers.  I will not eat or sleep until I am finished so you can have your grade tomorrow.

Student:  Finally!  Someone who appreciates my priorities!

We're going to need to work on the concept of facetiousness, apparently.